Tag Archives: Baby & Kid Stuff

Wordless Wednesday

What’s Important

Last week, a member of our TMN local chapter Charlotte Mommies and owner of a local business Ivy’s Diaper Service was killed in a car accident. She was carrying her second baby girl and leaves behind a grieving husband and young toddler. I didn’t know Garrett or her family personally and have never been a customer of Ivy’s Diaper Service, but hearing her story and the outpouring of love and support from so many locals makes me really look at my life and think twice about some of the things that sometimes upset or stress me out.

It has made me look at my two beautiful and healthy children and wonderful husband and really feel in my heart what’s important. It’s so easy to get caught up in life and finances, jobs, school, all of our daily activities. It’s so easy to forget to feel blessed when we have food on the table and tuck our babies in at night. It’s so easy to get lost in the moment and sulk over things that mean nothing and complain about things that some people would feel lucky to have.

Hearing the loss that this husband and daughter are going through makes me think about what life would be like if I were to lose Kyle. What would my life be without the people I love and care about? Thinking about this, makes me look up to God and close my eyes and pray for what I’ve been given and pray for this mother who will not live to watch her babies grow. I know what it’s like to lose a mother. I know the pain and grief I felt and continue to feel everyday when she isn’t here with me now. I grieve for her daughter and knowing she will experience the grief for the rest of her life and I feel blessed that I had my mother for as long as I did.

Hearing about a loss like this really has made me reflect on my own and what I have rather than think about what I don’t. I have some amazing friends and family surrounding me and my beautiful children and I am truly blessed and I will continue to thank God everyday for the life that he has given me.

My friend Ashley (owner of Miss Monkey’s Boutique) has set up a Memorial Fund to help Ivy and Mike (the husband and daughter of Garrett.) If you would like to contribue, 100% of all proceeds will go to her family, you can donate here.

Tuck your kids in tonight. Kiss them. Hug them. Tell them you love them. And be thankful and say a prayer for Garrett, Mike, Ivy, and their unborn baby Rosie.

“Be on guard. Stand firm in the faith. Be courageous. Be strong. And do everything with love.” 1 Corinthians 16:13

Real Life Confessions of a Stay at Home Mom

Spit up, Poop, snot – OH MY! This seems to be my life the last month (Yes – as of August 1, Lavery is ONE MONTH OLD….. When did THAT happen!?) Being a stay at home of two, I’ve had to completely re-adjust our routine and normalcy and replace it with chaos and insanity. Pregnant with LC, the entire pregnancy, I read about the importance of a routine, the EASY method (I seriously read “The Secrets of the Baby Whisperer” cover to cover…. more than once!,) and sleeping when the baby sleeps. All of which… I did, from day one with success.

With baby number two though, there wasn’t a book that told you how to stay sane NOT being able to do all of those  things with a two year old attached to your hip. It’s been a challenge adjusting to life with two and I am still figuring out how to make all of my own thing (like this website, The Charlotte Moms, The Mommies Network, and school too, work)… you know, all those things I do in ADDITION to staying home with two kids!

My “job” though is being a stay at home mom. Being a stay at home mom doesn’t mean not doing anything though or having a purpose. Honestly, I feel like my job has more of a purpose than any other job out there. Who can say what they do in the office is more important than raising babies? I’m not saying people’s job’s aren’t important, but raising babies is the most rewarding, challenging, and important job I could ever have for myself.

However (and this is where the comedy might come in,) just because, I stay home, go to school, write for two websites, and volunteer for a non-profit doesn’t mean I don’t indulge either. By indulging I mean….. yes.. SOAPS! I just have to say. The “real” life of a stay at home mom means looking forward to the moments of free time and sulk in the lives of the residents of Pine Valley and Llanview. This is only a small fraction of my day, but after changing 1o dirty diapers, cleaning up spit up, or the third shower of my morning, because I’m dripping in baby vomit… my real life confession is I like to watch soap operas!

These little angels are my life. BUT… being a stay at home mom sometimes means needing wine (to drown out the WHINING,) counting down the hours, minutes, and seconds until your husband comes home, so you can get the heck out! And wasting time imagining your life in the lavish town’s of Pine Valley, PA and Llanview, PA. If only I was on that red carpet of “Vicker Man” last week…….. sigh.

The Guilt….

Being pregnant for the second time is no piece of cake. For starters, there’s NOTHING the same about this pregnancy from my first, so I feel like I’m all new to this already, but when people used to tell me how guilty they felt for their other children when bringing another baby into the world, I never believed them…… until now.

This feeling of guilt for LC and how we are taking the spotlight away from him is killing my heart. He’s my baby. I remember right after he was born, I looked at his beautiful, sleeping eyes and then I looked at Kyle and said “I never want anymore kids. I can never imagine loving another human being as much as I love this one right here.” And after growing up wanting four plus children, my decision in that instant was made. LC was made to be loved by me and no one else. He was my one and only baby and I didn’t want anything else.

….. Then he grew a little older and although that love was still the same, my feelings changes about wanting more kids. We went back and forth and talked about it for a while. Friends got pregnant, babies were everywhere. I knew at that point (once LC was a little older than one) that I would want more kids, and I remember hearing the stories of parent’s feeling so guilty and I just kept telling myself bringing another baby into the world would be so special for him. He would have someone to share things with growing up and another baby would be such a blessing.

Another baby is still a blessing. I thank God everyday for my family and we are thrilled to be bringing another baby into the world, but as I sit here… (and every day or night lately,) I am fighting back the tears crying for my baby…. my baby who’s life is about to change in a million ways. I have spent so much time crying thinking about my baby boy and how he is going to feel when we bring his baby sister home from the hospital and she never leaves.

I know he says “sissy” so much and talks to her in my belly and rubs her, and I know he doesn’t 100% understand the whole concept right now either, but he will be such a proud of terrific big brother. That doesn’t change how I feel. That doesn’t change how much I am going to miss the time with just him… snuggling him in his rocker after naps, snuggling with him in the mornings while he eats his breakfast in my lap, swimming in the pool, reading his favorite books. Those are all things you take for granted everyday, because it’s my life. My life is this boy and it has been the most amazing last few years of my life, but that is soon to all change.

I know I will love this baby girl just as much and have as many special moments, but it scares me so much to think I could be taking some of those moments away from LC. What if there isn’t enough of me to go around for them both? What if I lose those special one on one moments with LC and never get to feel them with this baby girl? These fears are starting to overcome me and as each day gets closer and closer to the arrival of this new baby girl, I’m worrying, stressing, and fearing how this change will affect LC and our family more and more.

I would say I’ve done a pretty good job not stressing out much throughout this pregnancy, but now that the end is near….. it’s really taking a toll. My emotions have been filling my head with this huge feeling of guilt and hope that LC doesn’t hate me or think I’m ruining his life. I look at him now and I feel such an abundance of love that I never want to take away or him to ever not feel. I love this precious being more than words could ever describe and I hope he knows that always and forever.

I hope his sister knows that too. I hope she knows that even though I’m feeling the way that I am right now and I have an indescribable amount of love for her brother, I have the same for her. I just know right now, LC needs me and he needs my attention and I want him to always be able to have that. I want them both to always be able to have that and I pray God helps me through this transition and he guides our family on the path of where we need to be…. together.

I want you to know Landyn Carter… you are my baby. You will always be my baby and no matter where life takes us or who comes and goes in our life, the feeling I have for you will never change. Being a mother is the greatest gift I could have ever been given and you… and your sister growing inside of me are the best part of me and by far my most treasured and greatest accomplishment in life.

I sit here writing these words… putting how I feel into this post, and I cry, because I am blessed with the most amazing life with you and I never want you to feel anything less than the love and joy you have brought into my life.

The baby bump is growing!

A few weeks back, my friend Leah came over to take some baby bump pics! I wanted to share a few of my favorites with you! Once LC saw me pull out an ultrasound photo of his baby sissy, he immediately ran over and got so excited! He is loving all this baby talk and I am loving having it with him!

He crawled into my lap, and grabbed the photo and pressed it against my belly. It was honestly the most absolutely adorable moment ever!

When these photos were taken, I was 30 weeks… and now I’m 31, onto 32! Time is flying by way too quickly, but I am enjoying every moment of this and preparing for a baby girl is a blast!

Hopefully I will be ready to show off some nursery sneak peeks soon!